FIGHTing

Friday, December 11, 2009

understanding myself

i thought i understood myself

well i did

but i cant put them into words

or

put them into good words, in my favour

i guess i can ask from my friends

yupp

they helped

but i am just so unsure that i m ready for another complainy commitment

i have tried too hard to immerse myself wholeheartedly into what i do

that i got myself lost in my needs and wants

then i complain, at times when i re-realize it again

i need to be inspired

i need to be encouraged

i want to be useful

i want to have time to absorb words as words

(instead of translating them to emotions, as it becomes easier to remember)

i want to be frank, honest, open

but yet

i have to be stick to the mud in certain things

i have to understand that a scholarship is never just what you think it is going to be, or will be

i told dad that

it's not about planning, or thinking about what i want

it really depends on what grades appear on my cert, and if people want me

it's not something i plan for, work for

and for sure

i'm getting it.

i am lost

applying for scholarship pushes me into thinking about my future career, my future course

i went to websites, libraries, to friends

find out about jobs, narrow them down

and well i felt better after talking to my trainer

Rahul

just now

Mass Comm can be a general yet related course to take.

JOBS in mind:

Educational Psychology

about--- kids, education, psychology, applied psychology, ever-learning, impacting others, helping

Advertising Creatives

about--- creating, ideas generating, interesting discussions, research, observing and analysing, putting ideas into action

Event Planner

about--- planning, ideas creating, executing events, problem-solving, sense of accomplishment, budgeting, datelines, liaisons

Kindergarten Teacher

about--- kids, education, innovation, fulfillment, impacting others

Dietician

about--- helping people, study of the human body, preemptive measures to healthy living, influencing health of a person

Speech Therapist

about--- helping people, innovations in treatments, observations, problem-solving, understanding the human tongue

Scriptwriter

about--- creatives, ideas, writing, creating entertainment close to heart

Theatre Studies

about--- music, acting, lighting, story, event planning, liaison, business and enterprise, arts, coordination, appealing to 5 senses

Hospitality and Tourism Management

about--- making people feel good, analysing, research, public relations

★ egOH ♥ 3:07:00 PM

Friday, November 20, 2009

I am! Yet what I am who cares, or knows?

My friends forsake me like a memory lost.

I am the self-consumer of my woes;

rise and vanish, an oblivious host,

Shadows of life, whose very soul is lost.

John Clare (1793 - 1864)British poet.
Written in Northampton County Asylum, where he spent the last 22 years of his life."I am"

★ egOH ♥ 11:23:00 AM

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

heeeeeeeheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeheeeeeeeee

hi

my name is hihi

how are u?

hi

oh really?

fine, thanks

oh hi!

and you are...

whoo

hmmm

hihi

=)

★ egOH ♥ 6:54:00 PM

econs

i hope econs are corns
so i can eat it up

bleah

★ egOH ♥ 6:22:00 PM

Monday, November 16, 2009

blankness

i watched flashforward yesterday.

it touched my inner heart.

the flashforward of nothingness.

it's either because i dont know what to expect or i dont dare to fill that blank.

living with no regrets.

it was once my resolution for a year, and well. i fulfilled it for that year, not ever since it passed.

probably for my other resolutions i should add a 'from now onwards' at the back of them.

"living with no regrest, from now onwards"
"love everyone, from now onwards"
"kill that bad temper, from now onwards"
"stop falsifying philosophying, from now onwards"
"stop dreaming, from now onwards"

...

★ egOH ♥ 1:56:00 PM

Thursday, October 22, 2009

by Dani Pizzo. on Flickr.

comments?

well, the guy can be the girl and the girl can be the guy.

★ egOH ♥ 10:38:00 AM

拿得起放得下...

2 breakups 1 got-together...

i was proven wrong again. humanity still triumps over thinking-mind.

if it was really a homosapien privilege, to have morals, ethics, love... there has to be accounts of those amidst this general-paper-alised world right.

it has been hard to get my a-level-is-coming-soon-clock to work again and i face this 'love' issue.

it is heartbreaking to see how he's responding to this.

no facts and figures on how much of the heart is broken, just a soul-less figure walking about desiring more security.

and i'll be damn heartless not to help u know.

no matter how much i try to avoid, and let the broken-hearted know that i want to go back to revision. i'll still succumb to a special concern i have for them.

i dont mean it when i said, "you are more important than studies, but a levels is more important than you falling out of love..."

trust me. i was just trying to strike a balance.

★ egOH ♥ 10:24:00 AM